Homeward Bound -- I wish I was??

At the start of this academic year, I was informed that I would be able to do my family medicine rotation at an away site if I chose to do so. Having heard some of the true horror stories of family medicine rotations here at Georgetown (ranging from having to drive 2 hours to a site to being "assigned" to babysit a doc's kid instead of getting a lunch hour), I decided it may be best to get out of here. But where to go? That's when I discovered you can go to an area that is rural and underserved medically. Hmmmm...rural and underserved but still located in the continental US -- do places like that even exist? These must be desolate areas where the weak are eaten by rabid animals and the barter system is still practiced. Where have I heard of places like that before?? Oh yeah, HOME!

Therefore, I made arrangements to work with a family friend in Punxs'y. Apparently, this doc's dad and my grandfather were physicians together back in the day. So, I thought this would be a great idea -- some free food, free laundry, and 4 weeks of relaxing. That's until I went home for Easter. Having spent all of 48 hours in Punxs'y, I realized there is a reason why I moved away. So while still hoping for the best, I leave on May 22nd to spend a minimum of 4 weeks in exotic western Pennsylvania. That being the case, I felt like I should give you some insight into what I am about to experience compared to Washington, DC. Prepared to be enjoyed and mildly horrified (emphasis on the later of those two).

-The District is the capital of the US of A. Punxs'y is the "weather capital of the world." Clearly one is more influential than the other on the world stage, but I just can't place my finger on it.

-In the District, businesses of all kinds flurish. In Punxs'y, the three main businesses you will find downtown are banks, auto part stores, and beer distributors. Clearly one of those three are incompatible with the other two.

-The District is home to the Smithsonian Institutions, a gathering of some of the most revered museums in the world where one can see everything from the Hope Diamond to the works of Monet. Punxs'y has a weather museum housed in the old post office. Enough said.

-The District has one of the best public transportation systems on the East coast including the metro, buses, and taxis. Punxs'y has one bus that's used exclusively to get the elderly to the grocery store and Walmart, that (last time I checked) is driven by my 4th grade band teacher.

-In the District, summer social events range from concerts to plays to professional sporting evets. In Punxs'y, summer social events pretty much includes the carnival coming to town, where you debate whether or not the carnie running the bumper cars was that kid who dropped out of high school and no one has seen since. Side Note: My sisters and I are SCARED to go to the carnival. Yes, scared. The carnival is like a lighthouse directing the strangest of the strange to its funnel-cake shores.

-In the District, young professionals dress nicely to do such simple things as walk down M Street. In Punxs'y, people wear Steeler jerseys to Sunday mass. Side Note: My aunt and uncle came to visit me once and we drove through Arlington during the lunch hour and my aunt was shocked by the number of people wearing "dress shirts."

-The District has numerous bar scenes including Adams Morgan where the young party until 3 am. Punxs'y has one bar with red shag carpeting on the walls, and if you go you will be hit on by the likes of which include your recently divorced high school math teacher.

-The District is a blend of people from all walks of life and all cultures forming a microcosm of the world. Punxs'y includes the Amish as the majority of our "diversity." Side Note: To give you an idea of the cultural sheltering I am talking about here, people find it interesting (in the exotic way) that my sister and I have Jewish friends.

-In the District no building can be taller than the Washington Monument. In Punxs'y we have the "world's largest groundhog" -- a testament of plywood located in the parking lot of the (wait for it) combination ice cream shop/shoe repair store. At this point, honestly, I WISH I was making this stuff up.

-The District is home to some of the best restaurants displaying cuisine from across the world. Punxs'y's fine dining includes McDonalds (which only opened when I was in 9th grade) and Sheetz (where my sister went to eat before the prom one year).

-In the District, people are on the whole culturally-progressive and liberal. In Punxs'y, people have "W" stickers on their trucks while flying the Confederate flag and making entirely logical (in their minds) connections between abortion, gay marriage, and terrorism.

-Last and certainly not least, the mayor of The District is Adrian Fenty, a lawyer and councilman. The mayor of Punxs'y is the owner of the local hardware/animal feed store and is best known as "Snake." Yes, you heard me right, our mayor's name is Snake. If that does not embody everything, I don't know what does.

All that being said, I still love my little hamlet in the Appalachian foothills. And there are some positive things about the town too (but common on, you know you don't want to hear them). You are always more than welcome to come visit to experience all this on your own. However, I realize that the odds of that happening are on par with Punxs'y believing in evolution (I'm pretty sure they think God created humans and groundhogs right before Jesus showed up). With a little over a week left at my home (far, far) away from home, give me a shout so I can make the most of my limited time in the District.